Adventures of K-Mad, NJ Shore edition, episode 247365711: Skinny Dipping

August 2014

K-Mad emerges from the pool, needing to use the facilities. I take her to go and remove her bathing suit. She ‘does her thing’ and refuses to put back on her wet bathing suit.  I acquiesce because 1) It’s a wet bathing suit and 2) I get that and 3) She’s 2 and 4) Like a pro, I {mostly} choose my battles with the wisdom of those who came before me and trained me well. (Thanks, Mom!)

So I wrap her up in a towel, carry her back to the pool deck and sit her on my lap. Plus, she’s very excited to be “incognito nudie-patootie” so it’s all good…

After a few minutes Bud requests a kick board from the side of the pool. I put K-Mad, still naked yet wrapped, on the chair, and proceeded to get the kick board for Bud. He swims away towards the deep end to hang with Lady J and….

…As I turn back towards the chairs, I see a towel-less naked K-Mad hop off the chair and step off the side of the pool deck and into the shimmering water with the all of the grace and form of an Olympic synchronized swimmer.

I jump in and grab her. She comes up, spouting water out like a beautiful garden fountain fairy and grinning ear to ear. “K-Mad!  You can’t swim AND you’re not wearing a bathing suit!” I exclaimed.

“Oh yeah, Mamma! I fowgot! Das so siwwy!” she laughed her trademark maniacal laugh, “Oopsies! Sowwy ’bout dat, Mom!”

#thiskid #sothathappened

(Thankfully, we were the only people at the pool, other than the lifeguards who we’re cleaning up for the day and didn’t seem to notice the nakedness of the situation. Also, I foresee boarding school, perhaps military, in her future)

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