CWK #247365711: I Spy

Lady J: I spy with my big blue eyes something white.

Me: Is it on top of a building?

J: Yes.

Me: Does it have triangles?

J: Yes.

Me: Does it have pyramids?

J: Yes.

Me: Are there sharp pointy things on it?

J: Yes!

Bud: Oh! Oh! Oh! I know! Is it that sharp, pointy thing with the triangles and pyramids that’s on the top of that building?

#roomwithaview #charmcity

  

CWK #247365711: Bud, On Bud

Strolling down the boardwalk Bud gently takes me by the hand and asks if he can tell me something. “Of course!” I respond, and this truly observant five year old proceeds to explain the complexities of humans with such honest simplicity:

“Sometimes I’m happy. Sometimes I’m sad. Sometimes I’m silly. Sometimes I’m mad. Sometimes I like to have fun. Sometimes I’m serious. But I’m always me. Even though it’s not always easy.”

#HowDoesHeKnow #truth #wisdomofchildren

  

CWK #247365711: The “Playground”

Lady J: Mom, can we play on the beach playground?

Me: What beach playground?

Lady J: You know… The green and brown one. It’s right on the beach. The one with the climbing things and tunnels.

Me: There’s no playground on the… Wait, you mean the drainage pipe? Sure… Why (the heck) not. (I feel like getting berated by complete strangers as to how I should raise my children anyway.*) Let’s go!

Lady J: Thanks, Mom! You’re the best mom we’ve ever had!

(That last part always amuses me, no matter how many times I hear Lady J say it…)

*It should be noted that I was only berated by one complete stranger as MY children happily played on the “playground”. But that’s for another post at another time…maybe

  

CWK #247365711: Best. Pancakes. Ever!

You guys, I’m awesome in the kitchen, mostly….we won’t discuss my brief moment in my early 20s that I thought grape jelly, orange juice, and who knows what else from the fridge wisked together made a nice sauce to bake or sautée chicken in…blech….so sorry to those who faked deliciousness… Thanks for your honesty…or confidence boost…whatever… 

{Also, unrelated to this story, here is a link of 83 (EIGHTY THREE!!!!!!) recipes* that successfully use grape jelly…  http://www.yummly.com/recipes/grape-jelly-chicken  *Mine is not one of them…}

Anyway, my skill, pallet, and repertoire have increased substantially since then, although there are still a few recipes that need improvements and tweaking and others that I completely avoid, especially baking and pancakes. Seriously…please don’t ask. (I’ve even been known to flub up fool proof boxed cake mix…I’m THAT fool.)

Tonight, however, the kids requested banana pancakes for dessert. I rarely serve dessert, much less make it, unless its a fruit salad, but it’s my anniversary so what the hell!

In full disclosure, the pancakes were actually supposed to be fried “frozen banana icecream*” but you know how frying frozen mush goes, as I discovered first hand, so I had to improvise on the fry. (*banana icecream recipe below)

I initially thought about just frying banana slices, but Lady J was insistent that she wanted real pancakes with three slices in each. (So glad we taught her to voice her requests using specifics so that miscommunication and misunderstanding could be kept to a minimum…)

So back to the pancakes: Mr. TheKing is, in fact, the pancake making king of our household. It’s a boxed mix and not at all healthy, but it’s full of fake-sugar-blueberries and yumminess so once or twice a month-ish, breakfast is his to make. But he’s not at the beach on weekdays, nor is the box that I could “just add water” to, so I again had to improvise.

Luckily, I did have a bit of whole wheat, non-bleached, GMO free, organic, leftover pancake mix from winter break (or, most likely, last summer, but we won’t discuss that).

The recipe called for measuring, eggs, oil, water, and the mix to make the batter. I guessed on how much mix was left, cracked a few eggs based on that, added the melted banana ice cream in place of the oil I didn’t have, and poured in some water until I thought the consistency was right.

Then I turned the dial on the flat top glass stove to 5 because I guessed that was around 450 degrees as the recipe called for and heated up the pan/skillet, using a coconut oil spray in place of butter. I then used an ice cream scoop to “measure” the batter and plop it in the pan. I sliced up some fresh-ish bananas and added three slices to each pancake. The result was luckily quite delicious!

  
  

Here is the short convo to follow this lengthy intro:

Lady J: Thanks, Mom! You’re my best mom ever!

Me: Am I the best pancake maker ever?

Lady J, without hesitation: No. Daddy is. But you’re still the best mom I’ve ever had, so you’ve got that goin’ for ya’

#truth
#outofthemouthsofbabes #keepingitreal

  

To make banana ice cream:

1) Peel bananas (I used over-ripe ones)

2) Mush and mash until smooth

3) Freeze

(Seriously, that’s it! It stays a soft, ice creamy consistency once frozen and if it gets too hard just let it thaw a few minutes before scooping. #whoknew?  Top with peanut butter, caramel, or chocolate for extra yumminess!) 

CWK #247365711: European Toast

Bud: Mom, can you like, save da challah to make Fwench Toast in da mowning?

Me: I’m not sure we have all of the ingredients.

Bud: That’s ok. You can dust make Spanish Toast.

#TrueStory #HowDoesHeKnow?

CWK #247365711: Talk to the Dad

So I’m sleeping, as many often do at 5am, and Bud comes in to our room to whisper, “Mom, I need a band-aid. I cut my penis.”

Most moms would probably throw the covers off and dart to an immediate “deer in headlights” stance trying to gather her wits while asking a bazillion questions, but I was caught in that middle time of dream land and life so his statement replayed in my head in that in between space for another hour or so while I sleepily asked if his penis was bleeding, which it was not, so I told him to go potty, get dressed, and make his bed. I would look at it when I woke up.

An hour later, he was dressed, I was awake, and we both seemed to forget about the whole (bizzarre) incident…until that night at bath time:

Bud: Mom, this is whewe I cut my penis. Look!

Me, wide eyed and having a horrific flashback in realization that it was not, in fact, a dream: Ooooohhhh, right! I see… It doesn’t look cut.

Bud: Yes it is. Look! (he shows me again.)

Me: Bud, that’s not a cut. thats where your urine comes out.

Bud: You mean my pee-pee? I know that! Look next to it!

Me, not seeing anything out of the ordinary: I’m going to call Daddy in. He might have more experience with this…Honey! (you don’t really think I call him “Mr. TheKing” for real, do you?) Can you come in here? Bud has something to show you!

Mr. TheKing enters the bathroom and I fill him in on the convo, so far.

MTK, looking horrified: Bud, how did this happen?

Bud: Well, my penis was cold so I twied to wawm it up.

MTK: On what?

Bud: My nightlight lightbulb.

MTK turns white as a ghost and proceeds: We NEVER touch lightbulbs. They get very hot. That was very dangerous.

Bud: I know that now, Daddy. I think I’m ok now. See? 

Me: Out of curiosity, why was your penis cold?

Bud: Because I took off my pajamas, of couwse!

Me: Bud, that’s why you’re supposed to get dressed when you wake up.

Bud: Oh! Wight! Well now I know that’s a weally good idea. I won’t fo-get that tomowwow!

#WhatTheWhat?!?!?!?!
#LessonLearned??????
#UnexpectedConvosWithKids
#NeverDull
#SoThatHappened…

CWKs #247365711: Loop Holes

Beach House TV Rule:
No TV while the sun is OUT.

This rule, new for this year, has surprisingly been working remarkably well, 3 days in…until this morning:

Bud: Uuuuuh, Mommy? Is it supposed to wain today?

Me: No, its supposed to be a beautiful day.

Lady J, looking at Bud as though theres a plot afoot: How ’bout tomorrow?

Me: There’s a chance of thunder storms tomorrow.

Bud, unabashedly smirking just like Mr. TheKing: Dat is weally gweat news. Fo weal, weally gweat…

Me: Why? 

Lady J, smiling her devilish grin: Because, your rule is that there’s no TV while the sun is OUT. If it rains, the sun won’t be OUT from behind the clouds so we can watch TV!

They high-five each other in celebratory solidarity, knowing they uncovered a massive loop hole in my rule…

Revised TV rule:
No TV while the sun is UP. This new rule comes complete with a science lesson on both the Earth’s orbit around the sun, cloudy weather, and a math lesson on TIME.

#wordsmatter

Convos with Kids #247365711: Kid’s Day

Bud: Mom, I would like dat football beanbag.

Me: Ok. We’ll put it on your wishlist.

Bud: My wishwist is gettin’ pwetty full. I don’t fink I can wait till my biwfday so I fink we need a new holiday and I will call it Kid’s Day.

Me: What’s Kid’s day?

Bud: It’s dust like Fatha’s Day and Mova’s Day but foe me, and MAYBE K-Mad and Lady J if day awe weally good too.

#NiceTryBud